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[雅思] C17-Test2 作文,AI 评分和范文,混合图 + 社会

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HelloWorld 发表于 2024-11-13 07:10:52 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式

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本帖最后由 HelloWorld 于 2024-11-13 14:45 编辑

Part 1
You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. Write at least 150 words. The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

c17-test2-writing-part1.png

我的原文ChatGPT-4o 修改单词和语法错误
The table and pie charts illustrate the incomes and outcomes for 2017 and 2018 in a police usage of Britain. While the table illustrate the imcomes and the pie charts introduce it's spense.

Over all, the incomes are increased in 2018 by all sources. While the spending is changed in salaries and technology, but the buildings and transport spending remain the same proportion.

The incomes were broken down to 3 sources. The first source is National Government, which provide 175.5 in 2017 and 177.8m in 2018, which increased by 2.3m. The second source is Local Taxes, which contribute the largest increasement from 91.2m to 102.3m from 2017 to 2018. Other sources only got a slight increase from 38m to 38.5m, and it is also the least proportion of the total incomes.

The fund was spent in 3 parts. The largest spending was salaries, although it was decreased from 75% to 69% from 2017 to 2018. The following part is buildings and transport, that both spent 17% in the two years. The last one was technology, which increased from 8% to 14% in the two years.
The table and pie charts illustrate the income and expenditure for 2017 and 2018 in a police budget of Britain. The table illustrates the income, and the pie charts show its expenditure.

Overall, the income increased in 2018 across all sources. While spending changed in salaries and technology, the proportion for buildings and transport remained the same.


The income was broken down into three sources. The first source is National Government, which provided £175.5m in 2017 and £177.8m in 2018, an increase of £2.3m. The second source is Local Taxes, which contributed the largest increase from £91.2m to £102.3m from 2017 to 2018. Other sources only had a slight increase from £38m to £38.5m, and it is also the smallest proportion of the total income.

The funds were spent in three areas. The largest expenditure was salaries, although it decreased from 75% to 69% from 2017 to 2018. The next largest category was buildings and transport, both at 17% in the two years. The last one was technology, which increased from 8% to 14% over the two years.
预估得分:ChatGPT-4o 5.0-5.5;Claude 5.0-5.5;Copilot 6.0-6.5;Gemini 6.0
预估得分:ChatGPT-4o 5.5-6.0;Claude 6.0-6.5;Copilot 6.5-7.0;Gemini 6.5


ChatGPT-4o 7 分范文:
The table and pie charts illustrate the sources and allocation of the police budget in a specific area of Britain for the years 2017 and 2018. The budget is provided in millions of pounds (£m).

In terms of budget sources, the total police funding increased from £304.7 million in 2017 to £318.6 million in 2018. The largest contribution came from the National Government, which rose slightly from £175.5 million to £177.8 million. Local taxes saw a significant increase, rising from £91.2 million in 2017 to £102.3 million in 2018. Funding from other sources, such as grants, showed a minor increase from £38 million to £38.5 million over the two years.

The pie charts reveal how the budget was allocated. In both years, the majority of the budget was spent on salaries for officers and staff, although this portion decreased from 75% in 2017 to 69% in 2018. The proportion of spending on technology saw an increase, rising from 8% in 2017 to 14% in 2018. Meanwhile, the share allocated to buildings and transport remained constant at 17% in both years.

Overall, the budget increased slightly from 2017 to 2018, with local taxes contributing most to the rise. Expenditure on salaries declined as a proportion, while investment in technology grew.


Claude 7 分范文:
The given figures illustrate the sources and distribution of police funding in a British region during 2017-2018.

Regarding funding sources, the total budget increased from £304.7m to £318.6m over the period. The national government remained the largest contributor, providing £175.5m in 2017 and £177.8m in 2018. Local taxes constituted the second largest source, rising notably from £91.2m to £102.3m. Other sources, such as grants, contributed the smallest portion, showing a marginal increase from £38m to £38.5m.

As for expenditure allocation, salaries for officers and staff consumed the majority of the budget in both years, though this proportion decreased from 75% in 2017 to 69% in 2018. Conversely, spending on technology saw a significant rise from 8% to 14% of the total budget. The proportion allocated to buildings and transport remained constant at 17% across both years.

Overall, while the total budget grew modestly, there was a clear shift in spending priorities from personnel costs toward technological investment, while maintaining consistent infrastructure spending.


Copilot 7 分范文:
The provided table and charts illustrate the sources and allocation of the police budget in a specified area of Britain for the years 2017 and 2018.

In 2017, the total budget was £304.7 million, with the National Government contributing £175.5 million, Local Taxes adding £91.2 million, and Other sources, such as grants, providing £38 million. In 2018, the budget increased to £318.6 million, with the National Government's contribution rising slightly to £177.8 million. Local Taxes saw a significant increase to £102.3 million, while Other sources contributed £38.5 million.

The distribution of the budget underwent changes over the two years. In 2017, a substantial 75% of the budget was allocated to Salaries for officers and staff, 17% was spent on Technology, and 8% on Buildings and transport. In contrast, the 2018 budget allocation saw a decrease in the proportion spent on Salaries, down to 69%. Expenditure on Technology dropped to 14%, while the budget for Buildings and transport more than doubled to 17%.

Overall, the data highlights a noticeable shift in the funding sources and expenditure priorities from 2017 to 2018. The increase in Local Taxes suggests a growing reliance on regional funding, while the redistribution of the budget indicates an increased focus on infrastructure and facilities in 2018 compared to the previous year.
Copilot 貌似没看懂饼状图,说建筑和交通的预算翻倍,其实两年都是 17%,没有变化

Gemini 7 分范文:
The provided data offers a comparative overview of the police budget in a specific British region for the years 2017 and 2018. Both the sources of funding and the expenditure distribution exhibit notable trends.

In terms of funding, the national government consistently remained the primary contributor to the police budget, providing slightly more in 2018 than in 2017. Local taxes also saw an increase over the two years, suggesting growing community investment in law enforcement. Conversely, the contribution from other sources, such as grants, remained relatively stable.

The allocation of funds reveals significant shifts in expenditure priorities. Salaries for officers and staff constituted the largest portion of the budget in both years, albeit with a slight decrease in 2018. Conversely, the proportion of funds dedicated to technology experienced a notable increase, indicating a growing emphasis on modernizing policing methods. The budget allocated to buildings and transport remained relatively stable over the two-year period.

In conclusion, the police budget in the given region witnessed a modest overall increase from 2017 to 2018. While the national government continued to be the dominant funding source, there was a noticeable growth in contributions from local taxes. The expenditure patterns highlight a shift towards greater investment in technology, accompanied by a slight reduction in the proportion of funds allocated to salaries. These trends suggest a strategic realignment of policing priorities to adapt to evolving challenges and opportunities.


Part 2
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write at least 250 words. Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

我的原文ChatGPT-o1 修改了单词和语法错误
With the development of technology, people spend more time on their smartphone, both for children and adults. I think smartphone is a good product to get information and have fun if we use it in a limit time, but it might be harmful to people if spending too much time on it, especially for children. So, in my opinion, spending too much time on smartphone is a negative development.

It is undeniable that smartphones are very important for our lifes, almost everyone has their own smartphones, some children get their own too. On the one hand, It is convinient to communite with others or to get information from the internet. On the other hand, it is also a good way to have some entertainments, for instanst, watching videos or playing games, which is helpful to reduce your pressure.

But spending too much time on smartphones has contract impact for us, especially for children. Firstly, seeing the screen for a long time might impact your eyes. According to a research, people need to spend at least 2 hours outdoor to get enough light, otherwise, we might get short eye sight, and spending to much time on smartphone indoors will reduce the time to be in outdoors. Secondly, spending too much time on smartphone means less time to communite with people around you, for example, your family, wihich is not good for your relationship. Moreover, children usually sitting at the same place while using smartphone, which leads to lacking of sports and harmful for their health.

In conclusion, using smartphone in a limit time daily is beneficial for children, but if spending too much time on it may impact both their eyes and their health.
With the development of technology, people, both children and adults, spend more time on their smartphones. I think smartphones are good products to get information and have fun if we use them in a limited time, but they might be harmful to people if spending too much time on them, especially for children. So, in my opinion, spending too much time on smartphones is a negative development.

It is undeniable that smartphones are very important for our lives; almost everyone has their own smartphones, and some children have their own too. On the one hand, it is convenient to communicate with others or to get information from the internet. On the other hand, it is also a good way to have some entertainment, for instance, watching videos or playing games, which is helpful to reduce your pressure.

But spending too much time on smartphones has a negative impact on us, especially for children. Firstly, staring at the screen for a long time might affect your eyes. According to research, people need to spend at least two hours outdoors to get enough light; otherwise, we might get short-sightedness, and spending too much time on smartphones indoors will reduce the time to be outdoors. Secondly, spending too much time on smartphones means less time to communicate with people around you, for example, your family, which is not good for your relationships. Moreover, children usually sit in the same place while using smartphones, which leads to a lack of exercise and is harmful to their health.

In conclusion, using smartphones in a limited time daily is beneficial for children, but spending too much time on them may impact both their eyes and their health.
预估得分:ChatGPT-o1 5.5-6.0;Claude 5.0-5.5;Copilot 6.0;Gemini 6.0-6.5
预估得分:ChatGPT-o1 6.5-7.0;Claude 5.5-6.0;Copilot 7.0;Gemini 6.5-7.0


Claude 7 分范文:
The widespread use of smartphones among children has become a concerning phenomenon in recent years, with many young people spending several hours daily glued to their mobile screens. This essay will explore the reasons behind this trend and evaluate its implications for children's development.

There are several factors contributing to children's excessive smartphone use. Firstly, smartphones offer unprecedented access to entertainment through games, videos, and social media platforms, making them highly addictive for young users. Additionally, parents often use smartphones as digital babysitters to keep their children occupied while they manage their busy schedules. The peer pressure to stay connected with friends through various messaging apps and social networks also compels children to spend more time on their devices.

In my view, this development has both advantages and disadvantages, though the negative aspects outweigh the positive ones. On the beneficial side, smartphones can serve as valuable educational tools, providing children with instant access to information and learning resources. They also help children develop technological literacy, which is increasingly important in our digital age.

However, the drawbacks are significant. Extended screen time can adversely affect children's physical health, leading to problems such as poor posture, eye strain, and reduced physical activity. More concerning is the impact on their mental development and social skills. Children who spend excessive time on smartphones often struggle with face-to-face communication and may experience difficulties in developing deep, meaningful relationships. Furthermore, prolonged smartphone use can interfere with sleep patterns and academic performance.

A particularly worrying aspect is the potential for smartphone addiction, which can hamper children's emotional development and reduce their ability to engage in creative play and independent thinking. Many children also risk exposure to inappropriate content or online predators, despite parental controls.

To address these challenges, parents and educators need to establish clear boundaries regarding smartphone use and encourage alternative activities that promote physical exercise, social interaction, and creative thinking. While smartphones have become an integral part of modern life, moderation is key to ensuring they enhance rather than hinder children's development.

In conclusion, while smartphones offer certain educational benefits, their excessive use by children poses serious risks to physical, mental, and social development. It is crucial for society to find ways to balance the advantages of digital technology with the fundamental needs of healthy childhood development.


Copilot 7 分范文:
In recent years, the ubiquity of smartphones has led to an increasing number of children spending significant amounts of time on these devices daily. This phenomenon can be attributed to several factors, including the easy accessibility to entertainment, educational content, and social interaction that smartphones provide. However, whether this trend is positive or negative is a subject of debate.

Firstly, smartphones offer a vast array of entertainment options. From games to videos, children are constantly exposed to engaging and often addictive content. This makes smartphones highly appealing, especially for children who are naturally inclined to seek out fun activities. Furthermore, the rise of social media platforms has made it easier for children to connect with their peers, fostering a sense of community and belonging. These digital interactions can be particularly valuable for children who might otherwise feel isolated.

Additionally, smartphones can serve educational purposes. There are countless apps designed to help children learn new skills, from language apps to math games. These tools can be highly beneficial when used appropriately, offering interactive ways for children to enhance their knowledge and critical thinking skills. For instance, during the COVID-19 pandemic, many schools switched to online learning, demonstrating how indispensable smartphones and similar devices can be for continuing education in challenging times.

Despite these benefits, excessive smartphone use among children can have detrimental effects. Prolonged screen time is associated with health issues such as eye strain, poor posture, and disrupted sleep patterns. Moreover, there is a risk of children becoming overly dependent on digital interactions, which can hinder their social development and ability to form meaningful relationships in real life. Additionally, excessive use of smartphones can detract from physical activities, contributing to a sedentary lifestyle and associated health problems.

In conclusion, while smartphones can provide educational and social benefits for children, the negative implications of excessive use cannot be ignored. It is crucial for parents and educators to monitor and regulate children's smartphone use, ensuring that it complements rather than replaces other important activities and interactions. Balancing screen time with physical activity and face-to-face socialization is key to fostering a healthy and well-rounded development for children.


Gemini 7 分范文:
The ubiquitous presence of smartphones in contemporary society has significantly altered the way children spend their leisure time. It is increasingly common to observe young individuals engrossed in their mobile devices for extended periods. This phenomenon can be attributed to several interconnected factors.

Firstly, smartphones offer an unparalleled degree of convenience and accessibility. With a single device, children can connect with friends and family, consume a vast array of digital content, and play interactive games. The portability of smartphones means that children can engage with these activities anytime and anywhere, making them highly appealing. Moreover, the design of many smartphone applications is intentionally addictive, employing psychological techniques to encourage frequent use.

Secondly, societal attitudes towards screen time have evolved in recent years. While excessive screen time was once viewed with concern, it is now often seen as a normal part of childhood. Parents may feel pressured to provide their children with the latest technological gadgets to keep up with their peers. Additionally, schools and educational institutions have increasingly integrated technology into the curriculum, further normalizing the use of digital devices.

While the widespread use of smartphones offers numerous benefits, such as access to information and opportunities for learning, it also raises concerns about its potential negative impacts on children's development. Excessive screen time has been linked to a range of problems, including physical health issues like obesity and sleep disorders, as well as social and emotional difficulties such as reduced attention span and increased social isolation. Furthermore, the constant exposure to curated online content can distort children's perceptions of reality and make it difficult for them to develop critical thinking skills.

In conclusion, the prevalence of smartphone use among children is a complex issue with both positive and negative implications. While smartphones offer numerous benefits, it is essential to strike a balance between digital and non-digital activities. Parents, educators, and policymakers must work together to promote healthy digital habits and ensure that children are able to develop the skills and resilience needed to thrive in an increasingly digital world.

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wszano 发表于 2024-11-13 12:10:43 | 显示全部楼层
本帖最后由 wszano 于 2024-11-13 12:14 编辑

可以考虑对你大作文做一些同义替换可以到6.5甚至是7.0,举个例子,用 exerts detrimental and downstream impacts on 替换 has a negative impact on,contribute significantly to … 替换 are very important for,包括be beneficial for这些都是烂大街的表达了,没有亮眼的词汇的话是很难跨越6.0到7.0这个门槛的,7.0以上的话就要考虑论据丰富程度还有是否是强论据这些问题了,我感觉7.0以下主要还是语言表达问题

点评

多谢提醒,目标 6 分以上 不太敢用太高级的词汇,担心写错 不过记住一些常用的确实很有帮助 🤝  详情 回复 发表于 2024-11-13 12:46
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 楼主| HelloWorld 发表于 2024-11-13 12:46:10 | 显示全部楼层
wszano 发表于 2024-11-13 12:10
可以考虑对你大作文做一些同义替换可以到6.5甚至是7.0,举个例子,用 exerts detrimental and downstream i ...

多谢提醒,目标 6 分以上
不太敢用太高级的词汇,担心写错
不过记住一些常用的确实很有帮助 🤝
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